Talking to strangers
The other day I was sat up at my favourite spot in the neighbourhood. After huffing and puffing up the hill, I was greeted with a spectacular mosaic of colour and texture, the fabric of the natural world woven together to form a perfect picture. The surface of the green-blue sea rippled in the cool, clean breeze. The deep green hills, thick with vegetation and dotted with wooden houses, rose up into the light blue sky. The tui dashed loudly and inconceivably from one seemingly satisfactory tree to another. The fern fronds and pōhutukawa trees bobbed around the edges, framing the delightful view. Pollen hung thick in the air, its perfume a heady and floral. This is my thinking spot, my being spot, my not-doing-anything spot.
Suddenly I heard footsteps as someone joined me. I felt compelled to say hello, slightly unsure whether I wanted to break the spell of silence and aloneness that I so enjoy up there. He was a middle-aged guy who looked like he was just out for an afternoon stroll around the neighbourhood. After some banal chat about hayfever, I did the polite thing and asked a few more questions. I quickly ascertained that he doesn’t live around here and he is from the States. In this COVID-19 world, I found myself wondering how he ended up in Wellington, as we are still pretty shut to tourists.
All of a sudden he was pointing me to something in the harbour. ‘Come here’, he said. ‘See that ship out in the harbour, the red one, that’s mine.’ His?! ‘I’m the captain.’ Whoa, whoa, whoa. I grilled him for a good ten minutes. He is the captain of a US Coast Guard ship that spends 4 and a half months a year cruising from Hawaii to Antarctica, stopping at a few beautiful spots on the way to pick up snacks and stretch their legs (or something along those lines). When he gets to Antarctica, the boat breaks up the ice for other ships to pass through! Who knew that this is even a job that exists.
While this was quite an extraordinary person to stumble across and get talking to, it reminded me of the importance of being open to strangers and exchanging a few friendly words, even if I often feel reluctant to do so. I’m not sure why, but I think we talk a lot less to strangers nowadays. As much as my introvert self tells me that it’s easier just to keep to myself, I almost always feel great after chatting to a stranger. It reminds me that we are a social species and connecting with other humans is fundamentally what we want and need. Not everyone you randomly get chatting to is going to offer to send you pictures of wildlife in Antarctica, but every person has a story and most want to offer something back, even if it’s just a smile.
“And in the end, the love you take, is equal to the love you make.”